Numb

I’ll numb today,

like the lost voices in the shadows,

I can’t tackle these expressions like you can,

your stoned woe is an unhealthy silence,

I can’t reciprocate like you can,

your stillness and peace is blunt,

I don’t really need you to rub it on,

it can already make me feel numb.

But you know what I can do more than you?

Feel anodyne like they are skittles,

it is musical to be numb,

it is aromatic to feel nothing,

does it numb the pain

or does it numb the feels of you?

I forget.

It’s no way to live,

but it’s the only way to exist.

It’s kinda enmeshed,

but at least I am responding,

some day,

I won’t answer back,

some day,

liniments won’t be thinning

the numbness,

some day,

someone will yearn me

as the sky turns pale,

some day,

someone will write about me,

and it will be kind of sad,

but ain’t that life?

My mind got so much in it,

it just wants to get away from here.

Some days I can sense the end

creeping closer on the calendar,

some days I can breathe like an old summer

and it reminds me that this is nothing,

some day I will be up,

but not today.

I’ll numb today.

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