So it was a simple late night burst of blood,
like a traumatic nosebleed.
Maybe I’ve been crooked with things lately,
you thought the same, too.
So I shrugged it off.
And then it happened again.
Something was wrong.
We almost always tend to deny thinking
until it’s coming off in small strips,
in skinny bits
inside the layers of our skin
and we start to feel the small flame
called life fade into ashes left by
the burns of a chain smoker who
doesn’t know when to quit.
I won’t quit.
I don’t be like the one I was yesterday.
I’ve lost people.
I’ve lost friends, fake ones
and genuine ones.
I’ve lost things.
I’ve lost so much weight.
You’d think I haven’t been eating right,
but the doctor narrated a different story.
Every emotion turned into a poem,
for every feeling that I couldn’t get rid of,
feelings that stuck like an old gum in our
college desks –
those poems be never posted.
I’ve known this for so long now
and I’m still an utter mess.
These early twenties may cease like
an old dusted soul that has had enough of
everything but –
I’ve still got a few sparks left in me.
You are my little glimpse of sunlight
beneath this heavy sky full of rain.
I tilt the angles to see a glimpse
of your charm.
You even reflect the moonlight
and I write myself to sleep.
I don’t answer anymore
but neither does anyone listen anymore.
I am just trying to live my prayers.
I may be gone soon like the night star
leaving behind its lasting legacy.
The reds may continue to bleed a
little longer than usual but this body
is brittle enough to make copper sound like
I’ll never be able to thank
a bunch of people, a handful.
I won’t create a scenery,
for I have no clarity to
how much longer I have.
Maybe I’ll stop writing some day,
about it all,
Maybe you’ll forget about me – easily.
Maybe I’ll forget about me – slowly.
But I never forget about you.
Looking into the layers
surpassing the view inside this mirror,
I sign off.
Oh, by the way,
I have a little wink for you. 😉